Sunday, September 24, 2006

If you are mature, don't judge "Update"

Many thanks my friends for your valuable opinion and insights, I do think too that Maturity has a lot to do with responsibility…
A highlight from Wikipedia confirmed what we had in mind about responsibility.. .it's related to actions and their consequences.
So in this sense being mature is not only how we are prepared to anticipate, face and then bare the consequences of what we do. but also it's being responsible about the ACTION first that will have all these followings.
For me … being understanding is mature, controlling one's anger is mature, picking the right words at a debate is matue, giving execuses to others is mature, forgiveness is mature, loving someone unconditionally is mature, saying the truth with no fear is mature, standing up for your beliefs is mature, accepting the differences and deal with them is mature (being open and flexible), listening to the oponents point of view and respect it is mature, ….
As for my answer for the question, Am I mature? No … not always, trying to be though. Thinking of the how it feels when an imature act or word is faced from someone and how dissapointing it can be. So that's what I am afraid of that I can hurt or let someone down beacause of my ignorance of the situation, selfishness or my unwillngness to have some dicipline upon myself.
As for the judging piece, what provoked me to write this post was a judgemental opinion related to maturity, It struck me How anyone can judge another so easily.
Maturity is neither a quality nor is it about age… it's a measurement, a degree of how do we handle situations.
Finally, we can't expect us or anyone else to be always mature or always right … it's against being human.
Don't know if I am right on what I said or not, it's just my thoughts about maturity.

I know it is just not the time to ask such a question but I really want to know how people think of that word "Maturity" who is "Mature" and who isn't.
I won't start and say what my definition to a "Mature" person is. (Will update this post and add my opinion).
But I will very much appreciate to hear what do you think..
Why would you call yourself or any other person "Mature", how can you judge, what is the criteria.
BTW, I do believe that there is a child inside every one of us who needs care, tenderness, love, security and protection and yet that doesn't affect her/his maturity.
Don't you agree ???


  • At 1:29 AM, Blogger Hechkok said…

    There is no point in being grown up if you can't be childish sometimes.
    Maturity is the phase in which you push yourself to do things you don't like because you know they are right for you and vice versa.In my case I always feel I am pushed to be Mature and I am trying to escape it.

  • At 7:40 AM, Anonymous Ha Ana Za said…

    Mature: A sense of responsibility and I guess some experience of the world- a worldly woman :)

  • At 8:29 AM, Blogger emlino said…

    Mature... maturity...
    Well, I don't know if I am enough mature to write about this... :)
    I think that rich a mature level it is to assume the responsibility and the capability to, as a friend of mine said some days ago, realise many of our dreams... It is to understand and have conscious of what we dream (what can be true and what can not be),… it is to be responsible above the aims that we establish... we don't have to judge... our acts express the maturity that we have reached until that moment... it is like a parameter to measure the responsibility throw our life.
    Now I've found why not I want to grow... my inside child doesn't allow yet... :)

  • At 11:33 AM, Anonymous marwa2006 said…

    Maturity: “The rate at which a person can mature is directly proportional to the embarrassment he can tolerate.”

    I think I agree.

    I also think we can never really tell or judge if someone's mature enough. It can be maturity to you, but to someone else it isn't. I guess it also has to do with being responsible.

    Kol sana wenty tayyeba ya Nesrina :)

  • At 9:02 PM, Blogger Emory said…

    Maturity has so many different facets. No single rule governs all.

    For me, I think maturity is showing those behavors that are appropriate to a given situation.

    Also, it is a willingness to accept resposibility for your actions, and perhaps the actions of others.

    Maturity can also be found in giving of oneself, to better the lives of others. Becoming bigger than the "selfish me" .....

    and the ability to question authority in a dignified manner. Not just becoming a "push-over" for the will of others..... or

    A need not only to learn, but to understand, not just to listen, but to hear, not just to see, but to feel, not just to experience, but to share that experience.

    I don't think we ever become fully mature. To grow you should remain green, when you ripen and mature, you begin to rot... such is it with fruits and flowers and nature.

    A very provocative question Nesrine. Maturity, a single word with so many different meanings!

  • At 5:34 AM, Blogger a h m a d said…

    I link maturity with being able to see several steps far ahead in contrast to being immature and short-sighted.

    A mature person tends to think before he acts and tends to calculate the results of any step before he take it.

  • At 7:47 AM, Blogger ~Mystery~ said…

    Happy Ramadan ya Nesrin :)

    I think maturity is all about being responsible and caring at the same time. Also, it has to do with being thoughtful and logic.

    So I guess I'm not mature yet!

  • At 2:35 PM, Blogger Wonderer said…

    Happy Ramadan to you Nesreena.
    As for maturity, I think it is all about being responsibe. With responsibility comes maturity.

  • At 1:31 PM, Anonymous youssef said…

    I think we can't relate being mature to being responsible... creating such a relation would trap us in the logical next question: is it a two-way direction relationship; the mature is responsible, and the responsible, in turn, should be mature ..?!! Hah?

    Being responsible is easy to describe or at least it seems to me so... we can define being responsible in negative term, which is the willing to accept the consequences of a self-action... but now it seems hard to define responsible in positive terms :)

    Back to MATURE...
    It seems very relative... so i don't like to relate it to some other relative term... this complicates things...
    I can define it as follows: It is knowing the game, the rules, and successfully beginning to score :)


  • At 7:33 AM, Blogger Nesrina said…

    Depends on what this childness can result in, childness as in weak, vulnerable, or needs help… it's natural. But as to hurt yourself or anyone else, no.
    And yes it's part of being a grown up, it's not easy for anyone. We all feel the same sometime not only you.

    Ha Ana ZA,
    I do agree with you, sense of responsibility .. true.

    What I liked is when you started with saying "Well, I don't know if I am enough mature to write about this... :)" I wanted to say the same thing. It's because we feel how big it is. The child inside us always looks for the good old days and holds us back sometimes from moving on 

    Emabaressement ??? didn't think about embaressment. Need to think about it.
    I do agree with the tolerance and responsibilty though.
    Kol sana wenty tayeba ya Marwa 

    Very true and inspiring, I do totally agree with you. I know it was a provokative question but you really helped me in making is less provokative, more understandable.
    "Maturity can also be found in giving of oneself, to better the lives of
    others. Becoming bigger than the "selfish me" ....." thank you.

    That's another interesting insight,,, see the steps ahead, It's very mature and wise I must say.

    Ramdan Mubarak my dear,
    Caring, thoughtful and logic …. Yes that's the maturity I had in mind.

    Kol sana wenty tayeba we ramadan kareem.
    Responsibility is KEY.

    I kept thinking about your two way question. It's very relative…
    As for the definition, for me it's not that easy there are other factors involved.

  • At 7:21 AM, Blogger emlino said…

    I think you have very mature thoughts :)))

    I think that the child wants to say that he has so many more things to live as a child and he's afraid that, when he finally grow up, can’t do them anymore... but in fact that doesn't have to be or to happen that way always... Life can have much more fun if we let our inside child lead the boat sometimes. Our maturity will say when that can be good for us and the ones around.

  • At 2:18 AM, Blogger Jannah said…

    oh what a face blushing post

    To me Maturity is less about the Mature serious look and more about being who you are, with the child within,excited randomly, laughing when happy (just who you are), AND stepping up, helping people, solving problems and above all: being responsible for yourself and others.

    + taking the blame when you're wrong and the ability to give an apology.

  • At 12:51 AM, Blogger Hechkok said…

    It is immature to continue talking in this subject ;-)

  • At 10:15 AM, Blogger Jannah said…

    nice one

  • At 12:37 PM, Blogger Nesrina said…

    Ok Hechkok... I won't talk then :)

  • At 3:07 AM, Anonymous Ha Ana Za said…


  • At 10:40 PM, Blogger PsychicWizdom said…

    Nesreen, I agree with you that there's a child in everyone of us, that needs to be nurtured. But that does not collide with the concept of Maturity. Maturity is a sense of sanity that keeps you in check when a sign of trouble approaches. It's the ability to take things lightly, when "freaking out" won't really help. Maturity comes in a package with responsibiliy, integrity and a whole bunch of ethics. And a lot more...

  • At 12:13 PM, Blogger Nesrina said…

    I am totally with you, it's a package.


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